Turbulence of the Coded wisdom...!

A sure sign of growing old is that you start developing an interest in your past, your cultures, traditions and values.

Being from a strict iyer family,as a Tamil Brahmin I was used to wake upto the chants of MS Subbalakshmi's "kausalya Suprabhatham"  echoing in background, with a shout of "amma filter kaapi" grudgingly as I struggled to wake up ,followed up by a stern reading of Hindu newspaper ,as that is believed to stir the reader's intellect,subjudice and devoid of any spelling mistakes for a strong vocab..All that has gone for a toss..!

Am also from the species who like Carnatic music and for movies consider Balasubramaniam and Yesudas as divine,and that's already a nostalgia!

Am also from the creed who at any point of time craves his soul by having sambar chawal despite going through a 7 course meal an hour back..That's corrupted by Junk food and people calling vada as an adaptation of doughnuts.!

When we visit temples in a mundu or traditional attire ,people here call us semi clad,not withstanding that it's a culture for us...That's corrupted by people's judgements

For us Onam and Pongal was a food fest while vishu a shopping spree,that is lost in oblivion 

I  take pride in knowing my nakshatram and gothram and believe might be the last generation to do so ,but I fear turning into an atheist..

While I lost my father at age of 15 and eventually left my home at an age of 28,the hungry stomach made me realise soon enough that honesty and values won't help you survive..

For the man who made me sit on my lap while I was trying to write for first time on a plate of rice,the man who ran behind me while I was learning to ride my cycle, and the woman who waited outside school waiting for my glimpse when I come back, I ask myself have I given them enough?

With my ego,my manipulative attitude there is a freeze to my brain's memory vault and my every visit to childhood though it had it's share of perfect moments,haunts ...all the above memories offered me an identity, but at some point all of my base was ruined,and once you are corrupted,there is no going back.

Despite all this, at some time we wish we had paid better attention to reminiscences that our parents shared over again and again with glazed expressions,take a leaf out of their experiences and pass the same simple virtues to your children,so that world becomes a better place to live in and you become the reason people believe in goodness of life.

By the end of the post I had my fill of niceness and nostalgia which took over me,intend to put a hard stop on it for the time being and embrace the mad,messy,chaotic,crazy mad life am living in from the very next moment..

They say,mind is an eternal paradox..

My mind is secure,and when the mind is secure it is in decay... May be the values with which my parents intended to raise me ,died forever.!

I need to go back to my roots..but am going to traverse alone